5 Things I've Learned About Homeschooling
I am quickly approaching 8 official years of homeschooling and through that time I’ve had to learn a lot. Besides what kind of curriculum to choose, how to start a co-op, what kind of homeschooler I am, or how my children learn, there have been a lot of things I did not expect and many that I had to accept in order to finally thrive. Homeschooling can take a lot out of an individual, let alone the whole family, but after nearly 8 years, I’ve finally learned that it doesn't have to. In this post I share 5 things I’ve learned about homeschooling that have truly made our lives more peaceful and less chaotic.
The Biggest Homeschool Killer: Overcommitting.
This includes: advocacy, volunteer work, church volunteering, multiple programs, sports, camps, classes and the list goes on. Keep it simple so you can truly enjoy the fruit of your life-work; motherhood / parenting / teaching. When you overcommit to additional activities for the sake of “socialization,” “keeping busy,” or whatever else, you often miss your opportunities to connect with your kids and that’s one of, if not THE most valuable part of homeschooling. I have found that when our schedule as a family becomes too full, we really disconnect as a family and leave little time for one another. It creates more stress and tension as we’re running to and fro trying to avoid being late or forget anything we may need. It feels like we’re in a constant state of fight or flight and can often to lead to a lot of overstimulation. Overcommitting to activities can often be the fastest way to kill your homeschool vibe. Make sure to leave space to just be and prioritize that time to connect with your children. On Mondays, my big kids and I read aloud together, sometimes grab breakfast and go explore. On Tuesdays, I get 2 hours with just my little one while the bigs are at their own program. I’ve found that my most favorite moments of teaching my children are the times when it is simplest, unstructured, feels natural, and enjoyable for all of us. This generally happens simply reading aloud with each other and being fully engaged in the conversations that follow.
Homeschooling is a lifestyle.
Don’t think of homeschooling as another job, another to do list item, or a curriculum you need to get through. Think of it as a lifestyle. What do you want to cultivate in your life and in your home? How can those promote and encourage your children to learn? Homeschooling truly is a way of life by the way it incorporates all facets of living into our daily education. When we learn how to naturally incorporate our daily rhythm into our plans for education, it starts to become second nature. Finding your anchors throughout the day of when your children will be most amenable, like after they’ve expended a decent amount of energy from a physical workout or hard play time, or during a slow meal when the kids are already seated to read a poem or passage aloud, or during bath time to learn a new song, or before bed to read a novel together as a family, or listening to a great podcast in the car together as you shuffle from one place to the next, or scheduling your handwriting time during your little ones nap time. The pieces of education slide into place with ease when you start to view homeschooling as a lifestyle and not something you must curate to death. Our children are born fully capable persons all we must do is provide an environment that safely allows them to explore and naturally learn.
Flexibility is FREEDOM.
Be flexible and give grace to yourself and your children. Mine are each so different from each other. Having to find different modalities for each of them to succeed has been challenging and humbling. I’ve learned quite quickly that I have to be willing to totally throw out a curriculum, program, class or whatever if it just isn’t working. And that’s totally okay. One of the best benefits to homeschooling has been the fact that I get to know my own children’s unique learning styles. Another benefit to keeping with a flexible attitude – there is no pressure for your child to “perform” at “grade level.” You are the teacher, your children are the class. If you need to adjust their work, their activities, or focus on one area of development longer than another, you have the freedom and flexibility to do just that. The attitude of flexibility not only extends to their curriculum, but also the ways in which we spend our time. Homeschooling provides a rare opportunity to truly make life what you want — take advantage of what being flexible in your homeschooling could look like. Change up the scenery for a lesson, try a unit study or pick up notebooking as a style of teaching with your kids. Learn something together! The opportunities of freedom are endless with homeschooling and never has to look one particular way! Enjoy it!
Community can be lifegiving.
Community from the start makes a huge impact, especially when your children get to grow up together. But it also isn’t the end if you’re years in and haven’t found one yet. Having lost half of my original community to other states and new groups, while also being the same group my kids grew up with in their first years of homeschooling was extremely hard. But finding new communities and building new friendships IS possible and so rewarding. We NEED villages to love, protect and pray over these babies and for us to lean on each other when the going gets tough. If you find a village, hold on to it and don’t let it go. Those friendships for your kids and yourself will mean more to you than you’ll ever know. When looking for a community here are two key things I’ve found that really make a difference. The people in the community are committed to the group experience as a whole, always willing to contribute to make it a great time and the parents are open to building upon new friendships with each other while also helping their children to navigate new friendships too! Everything else is background noise. LEAN IN to community.
Life IS the Curriculum.
Through chronic health issues, political fights, new babies,, a pandemic, family emergencies, and more, our children’s “school” experience is much different than that of a child in public school. While most of the world had to place their education on hold so to speak, our children’s education was able to continue on in most of its normal aspects. Through daily life, our children are experiencing multiple different interactions and experiences and sometimes, the books and school work need to be put aside in order to prioritize the big LIFE things happening. A family welcoming a new child into the fold should absolutely focus on that transition. In fact, it one of the most transformative time in the entire family’s lives. Learning how to care for one another, care for this new baby, care for mother, and often times, how to fend for ourselves during a transition like that, these are important parts of our life experience that get to double as part of our school experience. Our family has had to press pause many times on “formal” homeschooling due to a back surgery, a new baby, political endeavors, health issues, and more. These are important aspects of our lives that our children had the opportunity to be exposed to and learned much about perseverance, determination, justice, inequality, health, nutrition, human development, and the list goes on. We often forget how the non-accademic parts of our lives are actually some of the most rich in content to teach with. Don’t forget to give yourself grace when “doing life” is all you can muster. I promise you, your children are still learning.